Never Kill A Boy on the First Date



In the cemetery, Buffy fights, and of course dusts, a vampire while Giles takes notes and criticises. As he does he notices an unusual ring among the pile of dust that is all that is left of the vampire. Intrigued, he sets off to consult his books.

Meanwhile, in the underground church, the Master reads from a book to his subservient subjects. The book contains a prophecy (the first of many) that the Anointed, a great and powerful warrior will come and will lead the Slayer to Hell, five will die and from their ashes the Anointed will rise. The Master however, tells another tale, of a vampire who went out hunting and got himself killed before his job was done, to teach the other’s a lesson he takes one of his brethren and throws them across the church. The unlucky vampire lands on a broken pew and turns to dust. He warns the others that they had better bring the Anointed to him.

The next day, Buffy and Giles are researching the ring and the symbols on it in the library when they are interrupted by the bookish Owen Thurman looking for a copy of his beloved Emily Dickinson. Smitten, by the handsome new arrival, Buffy stumbles over her words (unusual for her) and follows him into the stacks, feigning an interest in books. The attraction is clearly mutual. Owen leaves with his book and Giles is straight back to business but Buffy is distracted by thoughts of Owen.

Lunch time comes and Buffy and Willow talk about Buffy’s Owen adventure as they make their way to a seat where Buffy prominently displays her new Emily Dickinson book. Xander joins them and soon spots Owen himself, sitting on his own. Gathering up her things, Buffy heads towards him, just as Cordelia also spots Owen and heads for him too, knocking into Buffy as she does so, causing Buffy’s tray to fall to the floor. Owen rushes to help.

Cordelia casually mentions that she will be at the Bronze that night, but to her confusion, Owen is more interested in whether Buffy will be going and soon they have a date.

After school, Buffy and Willow head towards the library and are intercepted by Giles with bad news. He has discovered the prophecy about the Anointed and believes that it will come to pass that very night.

Still trying to balance slaying with having an actual life, Buffy joins Giles in the deserted cemetary waiting for the Anointed to rise. Who or whatever that may be, does not make an appearances. Giles has to admit that he may have made a miscalculation on the day and Buffy, off the slaying hook for the evening, heads to the Bronze for her date. She arrives to find that Cordelia has taken places, and leaves.

Meanwhile, a bus is taking four passengers home from the airport. On the bus sits a young boy, next to his mother, playing with a toy plane while a scary looking Militia type guy rants about judgement day. His rantings become more frantic and the driver turns to ask him to sit down, turning back to the road he is horrified to se he is heading straight for a pedestrian. He swerves but not in time, hits the pedestrian and crashes the bus. The driver checks his passengers are ok and then heads out to check on the injured pedestrian, as he leans over the apparently wounded man, the man reaches out and grabs him. Militia guy watches from the bus until the window smashes and the vampires attack.

The next day, Buffy is bemoaning her ruined night to Xander when Owen arrives. Buffy quickly offers some rambling explanation for her no show the night before and Owen explains that he only had one dance with Cordelia and soon they have rescheduled their date for that night. To ensure nothing can possibly stop her date this time, Buffy calls in on Giles and, not really giving him a chance to reply, makes sure that the end of the world was not going to take place that night.

In his lair, the Master congratulates his two remaining brethren on a job well done and warns them to ensure that the Slayer does not prevent them from bringing the Anointed to him.

That night, Buffy is getting ready for her date with a little help from Willow and Xander when the doorbell rings, believing it to be Owen, Buffy rushes to the door to find Giles standing there, brandishing a newspaper. The headline reads “Five die in van accident”. Giles is convinced that these are the five from which the Anointed will rise, but Buffy is rather more dubious. Owen’s arrival interrupts their conversation and appears rather confused by Giles’ presence at the house, but Willow and Xander drag him off to one side while Giles and Buffy finish their talk.

The two groups talk amongst themselves, Xander trying to put Owen off Buffy, while Buffy herself is trying to persuade Giles that the van accident has nothing to do with the prophecy so that she can go out on her date. Giles finally gives in and Buffy and Owen leave, while Giles heads off to the funeral home where the bodies from the crash have been taken, to check for himself. Willow and Xander follow.

At the Bronze, Buffy and Owen talk and dance, while at the Sunnydale Funeral Home, Giles arrives to find himself surround by the brethren. Making a run for the funeral home, closely followed by the vampires, he enters, finds the door to the prep room open and locks the door behind him, moving a cabinet in front of it just to be sure. The door handle is tried from the outside, then suddenly all is quiet. Leaning back relieved Giles is startled to find Willow and Xander at the window, just as someone starts pounding on the door again. Willow and Xander rush off to find Buffy.

Back at the Bronze, Owen goes to get some food as Angel enters, he walks in past Cordeia and stops for a moment looking around. Spotting him Cordelia springs into action, but just as she gets to Angel, he spots Buffy and makes a beeline to her, ignoring Cordela, who is left astounded that she has lost two guys in a row to Buffy.

Angel has, of course, come with bad tidings of the prophecies to come, and is surprised to find that Buffy already knows and yet is out on a date. Owen return, and just as things are becoming awkward, Willow and Xander rush up with more bad news. As Owen and Buffy look at them, wondering what they are doing them, Xander and Willow have to think on their feet and come up with “double” date as an excuse, while suggesting a visit to the funeral home. Understanding that there is trouble, Buffy makes her excused to Owen and leaves, after a moment she returns, kisses Owen and then leaves again. Owen and Angel stare after her.

The three friends arrive at the funeral home and start looking for the room that Giles is trapped in when Owen comes up behind them. This is not good. Leaving Owen with Willow and Xander, Buffy keeps looking for Giles. She finds the prep room with the door kicked in, the window smashed and no sign of Giles. Finding the room empty she is about to leave when she is startled by one of the drawers opened, turning around she finds Giles emerging from the drawer.

Glad he is safe, they move on to the problems at hand, the vampires the Anointed and Owen. Leaving Giles in the prep room once more, Buffy heads back to the others and finds a nice safe observation room for them to hide in. Making yet another lame excuse, she leaves them and heads back to Giles and they start looking through the drawers. Nothing but dead bodies, dead dead, not undead.

In the observation room, Xander and Willow barricade the door while Owen looks through the window into the next room, surprised to find a body laid out, he is even more surprised when the body begins to move. The body stands up and walks over to the window and we see that it is Milita Guy from the bus, now a vampire, but still obsessed with judgement day. Smashing the window, Militia Guy climbs through and Willow, Xander and Owen scramble for the door, removing the barricade.

In the prep room, Buffy and Giles hear the smash of the glass and Buffy runs straight out into her three friends. telling them to get out she heads back to Giles for weapons. Militia Guy, however, has found his way into the prep room and he grabs Buffy and throws her across the room.

Out in the hall, Owen decides he has to go and help Buffy.

In the prep room, Giles is helping Buffy, trying to fend the vampire off with a cross, but he too goes flying across the room, landing on the button that starts up the furnace. Recovering, Buffy gets up and she and the vampire fight. This is the scene that Owen walks into, seeing the commotion he grabs a tray and starts hitting Militia Guy, getting his attention. Militia Guy turns to Owen to be hit again with the tray which knocks him down. Pleased with his work, Owen turns to Buffy, but the vampire is not down yet, rising back up behind Owen, he grabs him and slams him into a drawer. Owen goes limp. Buffy gets mad.

She pounds on the vampire as Willow and Xander rush in to help Owen who is starting to come around. Still believing that Owen is dead, Buffy kicks the vampire hard sending him flying to the oven’s gurney, which rolls into the oven. Giles slams the oven door shut and the vampire meets a fiery death.

Owen comes to rather groggily and decides he has had enough for one day and heads off home, Willow and Xander following to make sure he gets there in one piece.

The next day at school, Buffy is quizzing Willow and Xander about whether Owen said anything about her on the way home when Owen himself makes an appearance. Willow drags an unwilling Xander away, leaving Buffy and Owen to talk. Convinced that he is going to dump her, Buffy is surprised when he says that we wants to see her again. Turns out that nearly getting killed was kind of a thrill for him and, as much as she likes him, Buffy knows she does not need a thrill seeker in her life right now, and sadly turns him down.

Back in the underground lair, The Master repeats the prophecy of the anointed as the young boy from the bus sits and listens.


  1. Giles states that he does not have a Slayer instruction manual, however we later learn that there is a Slayer Handbook which Giles thought would not be redundant in Buffy’s case.
  2. After throwing one of the brethren across the room, the Master says “Here endeth the lesson”. This phrase will be repeated by Spike in “Fool for Love” and by Buffy in “Showtime.”
  3. This is the first of episode which starts with Buffy slaying a vampire. This type of opening will be repeated many times during the series.


Giles: Buffy, when I said you could slay vampires and have a social life, I didn’t mean at the same time.

Giles: All right. I’ll just jump into my time machine, go back to the 12th century and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show.
Buffy: Okay. at this point you’re abusing sarcasm.

Giles: They came after me, but I was more than a match for them,
Buffy: Meaning?
Giles: I hid.

Giles: If your identity as a Slayer is revealed, it could put you and all those around in you in grave danger.
Buffy: Well in that case, I won’t wear my button that says ‘I’m a Slayer – Ask Me How’.

Cordelia: OOo! Hello, salty goodness! Pick up the phone, call 911. That boy is gonna needs some serious oxygen after I’m through with him.

Xander: So, Buffy, how’d the slaying go last night?
Buffy: Xander!
Giles: Sorry. I mean, how’d the laying go? No, I don’t mean that either.

Buffy: See, this is a school. And we have students and they check out books and then they learn things.
Giles: I was beginning to suspect that was a myth!

Buffy: And a cranky Slayer is a carless Slayer!

Buffy: We haven’t been properly introduced. I’m Buffy, and you’re history!


  • When Angel, Willow and Xander are talking to Buffy and Owen, Buffy’s height constantly changes between shots. Sometime’s she’s standing on a platform so she can fit in the same shot as Owen!
  • At the conclusion of the episode, Owen is trying to set up another date with Buffy. In the background a woman in a red and black jacket carrying a red bag walks up the stairs. Seconds later, in the next shot of Owen, the same woman is walking up the stairs without the bag. Seconds after that, in the next shot of Buffy, the same woman with the same red bag on her shoulder is walking by at ground level.
  • At the funeral home when the new vampire awakens, his reflection can be seen in the glass cabinet doors behind him.
  • At the funeral home, when Buffy and Giles open up the different drawers to look for the Brethren, they open the same drawer every time. The crew made a few changes in the background and Buffy is probably on a platform the second time she looks, but it’s the same. You can tell by the smudges on the inside of the door.


  • Treason – Velvet Chain (While Buffy and Owen dance at the Bronze.
  • Strong – Velvet Chain (as Buffy and Owen talk at the Bronze.
  • Junky Girl – Pretty Boy Floyd (when Angel comes into the Bronze looking for Buffy.
  • Let the Sun Fall Down – Kim Richey (when Buffy breaks up with Owen at the end of the episode.

Episode guide
© Cider 04/08/2004

Characters and Story © Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy & 20th Century Fox


Author: Cider

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